So… let’s just say I have a litter.
There are at least triplets in this thar uterus.
Dr. D groaned, “Oh”.
My response? An involuntary “yes!” with fist pump.
One sac is significantly smaller than the others.
But then there is this “fluid collection” which both Matt and I thought looked suspiciously like a gestational sac. (In fact, at one point, Dr. D identified it as an embryo).
Dr. D, being a reponsible physician, is very concerned that I have so many.
But Mr. Sassy and I couldn’t be happier.
In fact, we are walking around with grins from ear to ear.
Very satisfied customers.
As we see it… each embryo has about a 20% chance of miscarrying at this point. Maybe it is crude… but we see having three sacs at this point good news. We see it as increased odds that we may actually have a take-home baby from this ordeal.
And yes, I am not ignorant regarding the complications associated with triplet pregnancies (I have spent time working in the NICU). But as I was telling Matt on our way home… why dwell on that now? It won’t change the outcome. If we do end up with triplets, there will be plenty of time to worry and deal with that later. No matter the outcome, I do not regret the decision to transfer all four embryos.
For now… we have at least three beautiful chances at a baby.
Monday, February 25, 2008
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Happy Valentine's Day, Matt!
So this morning I took a home pregnancy test.
It was positive.
They have been negative so many times that I was really starting to wonder if the second line actually exists.
But it does... and I had one.
Once I got over the shock (and took about 5 pictures of it), I wrapped it in tissue paper and put it in a gift bag for Matt (rancid urine, what every man would love for Valentine's Day).
It was positive.
They have been negative so many times that I was really starting to wonder if the second line actually exists.
But it does... and I had one.
Once I got over the shock (and took about 5 pictures of it), I wrapped it in tissue paper and put it in a gift bag for Matt (rancid urine, what every man would love for Valentine's Day).
Friday, February 8, 2008
In The Beginning...
Matt and Catherine met, fell in love and married. They decided to have children and then an egg popped out of the ovary and a sperm swam up the fallopian tube. And… oh, wait… this is the wrong story.
Let me start again (the whole Matt and Catherine met, fell in love and married part is still valid).
See… conception for us included not only me, Matt, his sperm, my questionable-quality-prematurely-aged (hey, who you callin’ old?) eggs… but also a Reproductive Endocrinologist (Dr. D), two embryologists, multiple anesthesiologists, a phlebotomist, a statistician, an IVF coordinator, a billing clerk and innumerable nurses and ultrasound techs… oh, and a couple of receptionists.
Forget the village, people…
It took a Fertility Center to conceive our children.
For several years we have been doing the TTC (trying to conceive) thing. You know, prop your hips up, go on vacation (yes, those who suggested this as the answer to our childlessness knew essentially NOTHING about us…). Oh and I can’t forget… the ever-famous “just relax and it will happen”. After a few years of relaxing, traveling and propping, we moved onto the brave new world of ART (Assisted Reproductive Technologies).
Yes, see… the “average” woman gets pregnant by the third IVF (In Vitro Fertilization) cycle. But those that know me well know I am anything but “average” (Mrs. Jorgenson, my third grade teacher would agree :-) ). No, I was apparently on a mission to determine how many failed fresh IVF cycles a woman would be able to do before being carted off to the funny farm. In case you are interested… I do believe the answer is seven :-).
Our IVF journey has been filled with medications, appointments, blood draws, ultrasounds and surgeries, along with a rollercoaster of hope and repeated disappointments. Matt has become quite adept with needles (Catherine, of course on the receiving end…).
In many ways our IVF adventure was typical.
But in oh, so many (important) ways it has been quite extraordinary.
There were signs along the way.
First off, the whole Respiratory Arrest debacle.
After the egg retrieval surgery for my second IVF I stopped breathing in the recovery room. You know… turned blue and all. The nice people at the Fertility Center resuscitated me (thanks, Dr. D!). No one had ever heard of this happening before. Not in the combined 30+ years of practice of the two REs (Reproductive Endocrinologists) who, along with about 8 staff members were staring at me with worried looks on their faces when I woke up. “What?”, I asked, “What’s wrong?’.
A fluke thing. One in a million.
It should have been a sign…
Oh, but there were other things that made me an “interesting” patient (by the way, not a good thing to be at a fertility center…). For example, after the first couple of IVFs failed, I started on a new protocol. Kind of semi-experimental. The protocol itself wasn’t unusual, but the timing of the embryo freezing and transfer was different (blah, blah, blah, stuff you don’t need to understand). They believed it would be particularly beneficial for “poor responders” (something else you don’t want to be at a fertility center…).
Sign us up!
We did the cycle and it appeared to be going well… until it didn’t. Again we had a BFN (Big Fat Negative). Funny thing, though… I was the only patient that month on the new protocol NOT to get pregnant. Yeah… funny. In fact, it took two more cycles before another woman received a BFN. Just something else I am famous for at the fertility center…
But I suppose you aren’t reading this blog to learn new acronyms or hear the unusual things about our TTC adventures. You are here because you heard we actually got pregnant. Ahhh… but keeping in line with my Most Interesting Patient status… that too was not typical.
If you are interested in an accounting of our 7 IVF cycles, you will find it here. It includes all the technical stuff that infertiles will understand and others will be confused by. Knock yourselves out.
For the rest of you fertiles, suffice it to say that we did 7 IVF cycles, which included 6 minor surgeries (one cycle was canceled before the surgery). Instead of putting embryos back at the end of each cycle as we did in the first few cycles, the embryos from the last three cycles were frozen just after fertilization. They were all thawed at once in February of ’08 (that would be the Mega-Thaw). The embryologists grew them out for a few days to what is know as “blastocyst” stage, and then the hope was that we would have some to transfer into my uterus (with any luck--- which had previously escaped us--- a singleton or twins would be delivered 9 months later), and some to freeze in order to produce #2 or #3 child. That was the hope.
As you have noticed, things with us don’t regularly go as planned.
We did have embryos to transfer. There were four.
One great quality (our first Grade 1 ever--- yippee!), one good quality, and two “ehhh” quality. The latter two were not of sufficient quality to freeze… so if not transferred they would be destroyed. They were not likely to result in a pregnancy. Considering our history of failed cycles and my (ahem) age, the plan originally was to transfer three. There ensued a discussion in the transfer room between me, Matt, Dr. D and one of the embryologists. We were given the choice whether to transfer three (and if so, which one of the two borderlines would be transferred) or all four. Since this was the bottom of the ninth inning (did I mention this was our LAST chance? I was retiring from IVF), and not a single embryo had in the past taken up residence in my uterus… we eventually went with all four.
But I had concerns.
“Triplets I could handle. But quadruplets? That’s a different matter”, I said.
Dr. D and the embryologist both smiled. We all knew the chances were… well… one in a million that would happen.
With our history, the chance of all four embryos implanting and developing into fetuses?
“Essentially nil”, per Dr. D and the embryologist.
We agreed with them.
“Transfer them all”, I said.
That whole “one in a million” thing should have caught my attention :-).
Let me start again (the whole Matt and Catherine met, fell in love and married part is still valid).
See… conception for us included not only me, Matt, his sperm, my questionable-quality-prematurely-aged (hey, who you callin’ old?) eggs… but also a Reproductive Endocrinologist (Dr. D), two embryologists, multiple anesthesiologists, a phlebotomist, a statistician, an IVF coordinator, a billing clerk and innumerable nurses and ultrasound techs… oh, and a couple of receptionists.
Forget the village, people…
It took a Fertility Center to conceive our children.
For several years we have been doing the TTC (trying to conceive) thing. You know, prop your hips up, go on vacation (yes, those who suggested this as the answer to our childlessness knew essentially NOTHING about us…). Oh and I can’t forget… the ever-famous “just relax and it will happen”. After a few years of relaxing, traveling and propping, we moved onto the brave new world of ART (Assisted Reproductive Technologies).
Yes, see… the “average” woman gets pregnant by the third IVF (In Vitro Fertilization) cycle. But those that know me well know I am anything but “average” (Mrs. Jorgenson, my third grade teacher would agree :-) ). No, I was apparently on a mission to determine how many failed fresh IVF cycles a woman would be able to do before being carted off to the funny farm. In case you are interested… I do believe the answer is seven :-).
Our IVF journey has been filled with medications, appointments, blood draws, ultrasounds and surgeries, along with a rollercoaster of hope and repeated disappointments. Matt has become quite adept with needles (Catherine, of course on the receiving end…).
In many ways our IVF adventure was typical.
But in oh, so many (important) ways it has been quite extraordinary.
There were signs along the way.
First off, the whole Respiratory Arrest debacle.
After the egg retrieval surgery for my second IVF I stopped breathing in the recovery room. You know… turned blue and all. The nice people at the Fertility Center resuscitated me (thanks, Dr. D!). No one had ever heard of this happening before. Not in the combined 30+ years of practice of the two REs (Reproductive Endocrinologists) who, along with about 8 staff members were staring at me with worried looks on their faces when I woke up. “What?”, I asked, “What’s wrong?’.
A fluke thing. One in a million.
It should have been a sign…
Oh, but there were other things that made me an “interesting” patient (by the way, not a good thing to be at a fertility center…). For example, after the first couple of IVFs failed, I started on a new protocol. Kind of semi-experimental. The protocol itself wasn’t unusual, but the timing of the embryo freezing and transfer was different (blah, blah, blah, stuff you don’t need to understand). They believed it would be particularly beneficial for “poor responders” (something else you don’t want to be at a fertility center…).
Sign us up!
We did the cycle and it appeared to be going well… until it didn’t. Again we had a BFN (Big Fat Negative). Funny thing, though… I was the only patient that month on the new protocol NOT to get pregnant. Yeah… funny. In fact, it took two more cycles before another woman received a BFN. Just something else I am famous for at the fertility center…
But I suppose you aren’t reading this blog to learn new acronyms or hear the unusual things about our TTC adventures. You are here because you heard we actually got pregnant. Ahhh… but keeping in line with my Most Interesting Patient status… that too was not typical.
If you are interested in an accounting of our 7 IVF cycles, you will find it here. It includes all the technical stuff that infertiles will understand and others will be confused by. Knock yourselves out.
For the rest of you fertiles, suffice it to say that we did 7 IVF cycles, which included 6 minor surgeries (one cycle was canceled before the surgery). Instead of putting embryos back at the end of each cycle as we did in the first few cycles, the embryos from the last three cycles were frozen just after fertilization. They were all thawed at once in February of ’08 (that would be the Mega-Thaw). The embryologists grew them out for a few days to what is know as “blastocyst” stage, and then the hope was that we would have some to transfer into my uterus (with any luck--- which had previously escaped us--- a singleton or twins would be delivered 9 months later), and some to freeze in order to produce #2 or #3 child. That was the hope.
As you have noticed, things with us don’t regularly go as planned.
We did have embryos to transfer. There were four.
One great quality (our first Grade 1 ever--- yippee!), one good quality, and two “ehhh” quality. The latter two were not of sufficient quality to freeze… so if not transferred they would be destroyed. They were not likely to result in a pregnancy. Considering our history of failed cycles and my (ahem) age, the plan originally was to transfer three. There ensued a discussion in the transfer room between me, Matt, Dr. D and one of the embryologists. We were given the choice whether to transfer three (and if so, which one of the two borderlines would be transferred) or all four. Since this was the bottom of the ninth inning (did I mention this was our LAST chance? I was retiring from IVF), and not a single embryo had in the past taken up residence in my uterus… we eventually went with all four.
But I had concerns.
“Triplets I could handle. But quadruplets? That’s a different matter”, I said.
Dr. D and the embryologist both smiled. We all knew the chances were… well… one in a million that would happen.
With our history, the chance of all four embryos implanting and developing into fetuses?
“Essentially nil”, per Dr. D and the embryologist.
We agreed with them.
“Transfer them all”, I said.
That whole “one in a million” thing should have caught my attention :-).
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
Recycling: A History Lesson
In the spirit of clarity, here is the requisite listing of the ugly IVF stats…
#1 IVF/ICSI/PGD 7 retrieved, 4 ferts, all chromosomally complex abnl per PGD, all stopped growing… NO ET!
So, as I am neurotic, and at this point was already good and hooked on IVF (love those needles!!!), jumped right back on the horse…
#2 IVF/ICSI 6 retrieved, 5 ferts, two “not so hot blasts” transferred….. BFN
Uh, yeah…. so egg quality lookin’ a bit on the… uh… rotten side. Need I say more? Ah, but there is more! Now, I don’t scare easily, I love a challenge, and as I was by this point FULLY enthralled in my addiction, but had not yet managed to completely drain the bank accounts…
#3 IVF/ICSI 16 retrieved (yippee for mdl flare!), 12 ferts all frozen at 2pn. Only ONE embryo grew past 8 cell… “ok” quality on transfer… BFFreakin’N
So at this point, I picked myself (and my rotten eggs) up by the bootstraps and walked back into RE’s office for a review. Dr. D is so nice… never calls my ovaries old, OR rotten (but you know he must be thinking it!). Now what does every desperate addict need? A plan to get more. More of whatever it is… and for me it is IVF. But I am no normal run-of-the-mill IVF addict here. Oh, no. We are going for the big time here… the extended heroin binge of the IVF world…. the MEGA-CYCLE. Three fresh cycles in a row (that would be #4, 5 and 6), freezing all 2pns as I go. Then one big cliffhanger of a thaw at the end. Salivating just thinking about it.
So, having been through 21 embryos so far, with no chromosomally normal ones to show for it... what are the chances, ya' think, that one of my bloody rotten eggs would turn into a viable embryo??? I'll let you do the math. (oooo, jaded, i am)
#4 IVF/ICSI 11 retrieved, only 3 fertilized :-(-- both put on ice.
Not exactly what we were hoping for to kick of the Mega Cycle. Had a mini-nervous breakdown. Ate tons of fab chocolate and sushi... washed down with massive amounts of Diet Coke. Eventually started acupuncture and eating an all-healthy diet. Became excited about cycling again and walked my rotten eggs back into Dr. Da Man's office and jumped up in the stirrups...
#5 IVF/ICSI canceled on stims day 7 for poor (read: almost no) response.
Ummm. Yeah. Never even close to having this problem before. Strangely not so upset by the time word came, as I was expecting it... E2 levels were in the toilet.
#6 IVF/ICSI 18 retrieved, 15 mature and ALL 15 FERTILIZED! Added to the 3 from IVF #4-- total of 18 2pns on ice.
#1 IVF/ICSI/PGD 7 retrieved, 4 ferts, all chromosomally complex abnl per PGD, all stopped growing… NO ET!
So, as I am neurotic, and at this point was already good and hooked on IVF (love those needles!!!), jumped right back on the horse…
#2 IVF/ICSI 6 retrieved, 5 ferts, two “not so hot blasts” transferred….. BFN
Uh, yeah…. so egg quality lookin’ a bit on the… uh… rotten side. Need I say more? Ah, but there is more! Now, I don’t scare easily, I love a challenge, and as I was by this point FULLY enthralled in my addiction, but had not yet managed to completely drain the bank accounts…
#3 IVF/ICSI 16 retrieved (yippee for mdl flare!), 12 ferts all frozen at 2pn. Only ONE embryo grew past 8 cell… “ok” quality on transfer… BFFreakin’N
So at this point, I picked myself (and my rotten eggs) up by the bootstraps and walked back into RE’s office for a review. Dr. D is so nice… never calls my ovaries old, OR rotten (but you know he must be thinking it!). Now what does every desperate addict need? A plan to get more. More of whatever it is… and for me it is IVF. But I am no normal run-of-the-mill IVF addict here. Oh, no. We are going for the big time here… the extended heroin binge of the IVF world…. the MEGA-CYCLE. Three fresh cycles in a row (that would be #4, 5 and 6), freezing all 2pns as I go. Then one big cliffhanger of a thaw at the end. Salivating just thinking about it.
So, having been through 21 embryos so far, with no chromosomally normal ones to show for it... what are the chances, ya' think, that one of my bloody rotten eggs would turn into a viable embryo??? I'll let you do the math. (oooo, jaded, i am)
#4 IVF/ICSI 11 retrieved, only 3 fertilized :-(-- both put on ice.
Not exactly what we were hoping for to kick of the Mega Cycle. Had a mini-nervous breakdown. Ate tons of fab chocolate and sushi... washed down with massive amounts of Diet Coke. Eventually started acupuncture and eating an all-healthy diet. Became excited about cycling again and walked my rotten eggs back into Dr. Da Man's office and jumped up in the stirrups...
#5 IVF/ICSI canceled on stims day 7 for poor (read: almost no) response.
Ummm. Yeah. Never even close to having this problem before. Strangely not so upset by the time word came, as I was expecting it... E2 levels were in the toilet.
#6 IVF/ICSI 18 retrieved, 15 mature and ALL 15 FERTILIZED! Added to the 3 from IVF #4-- total of 18 2pns on ice.
Super stim for sure. I am very pleased with my rotten ovaries (pleased enough to consider no longer calling them rotten). This makes up in small measure for the bad results from #4. Not sure if it is the acupuncture, the supplements or Matt's vitamins that account for the change in fortune... so we will just continue all of it. Time is ovary, so we went straight into #7 (aka IVF Number Last) to see how many more of the little buggers we can freeze.
#7 IVF/ICSI (aka IVF Number LAST) 18 retrieved, 14 fertilized. Added to the 18 from #4 and #6--- we had a grand total of 32 of the buggers on ice.
For whatever reason... on my LAST IVF... my ovaries seemed to have kicked it into gear. By retrieval I had a total of 40 develping follicles in my ovaries (my NON-PCOS ovaries!). I suppose I can no longer call the little things "rotten" anymore. Now taking a few months off to train with (i.e., be beaten half to death by) a personal trainer in attempt to shed as much of the IVF hormone-induced weight as possible prior to a transfer.
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